I'm working with a lot more daycares these days, in an effort to apply some consistency to my existence, and I find that I tend to get a lot more out of toddlers in a daycare setting.
If I have a community group where the caregivers are very outgoing and creative, and especially if they're friendly outside of the program, the toddlers participate lots and show me their processes more often - in a daycare, its like this all the time.
But, at first, toddlers just watch. Mostly. There's almost always, at least, one with an intense rhythm beating at their core just aching for a playmate - that one (or more) always plays along right away.
For me, it's lovely when they're watching like that. I can see a finger twitch and a knee bend and I know that they're silently sending messages to their bodies to copy my movements. They know that they have to see it - really listen to me - to be able to copy me for real.
They have to know what to copy. It's the beautiful thing about fresh minds - there are few preconceptions (the ones they have, mind you, are burned deeply into their subconcious); they can't guess at what's coming next, so they pay closer attention to finer details than their older counterparts.
Kids in community sessions, with other families, will often watch only while in the circle but will show me things they've been working on while we gather or depart (a meeker child might show me how they've learned to raise their eyebrows while a bolder child might show me how they've learned to walk backwards). Most children will participate in the activities they find most interesting after 2 or 3 weeks of gaining familiarity with the group.
In daycares, they have formed a family and as a group they are welcoming me into their home. We can be more conversational because they have experiences as a group that they can discuss and the group is familiar with its individuals, so can respond readily to individual disclosure.
This works like an ice-breaker; the children connect with one another and with me and feel less like they are "performing" when they participate. It feels more like we're just sitting around with our friends...and if a song (we all know) should happen to break out, well - all the better! And if someone should have some shakers in a big purple pillow case....now we have a party! Of course we have to sing at a party when jennielea! is on stage! (in this way, I relieve their performance anxiety as well).
Its for this reason, exactly, that I like to take my time saying "hi" to everyone before a session (ok - that's SO not true - I do it because I'm exceedingly chatty and I love my friends but lucky for me(!) its an important aspect of my work).
It would make the children anxious if the first thing I said was "Show me how you clap your hands." I would be a drill sergeant then - but really, I am their friend....I might say it if they're already clapping ("O, can I see?") but normally the first thing I say is "Hi! Are you happy today?" and then I listen (that kind of thing helps me to know how to approach the group on any given day too, yes?).
Sometimes the toddlers are NOT happy. I have to listen some more to know whether I should try to cheer them up right away or commiserate for a minute or two. On these days, they prolly won't sing much - with their bodies or their voices - and I wouldn't try to drag it out of them.
Whether its due to shyness or to a lack of interest (many children prefer to be spectators) is not really that evident until you really get to know a child. Asking them simple questions and giving them a moment to respond can tell you a lot about the level of willingness to participate.
The most obvious example is children who look away (especially if they do it quickly and violently); they, steadfastly, do not want to be involved - they do not want to be seen - but usually want to watch.
One of three things happen when you wait that out (could be days, weeks, months and, in some cases, years but usually by 5): 1. one day they decide they want in 2. they continue to maintain the circle as a silent participant 3. they begin to wander to(or, if not permitted to wander: act out - I allow wandering) and lose themselves other activities. To be fair, silent participants may wander some, but will remain mentally focussed on activities in the circle.
But that's later - toddlers are sporadic, at best, and most often moved to participate by their level of interest, for example: a toddler who is into "Horsies" that week will sing Old MacDonald but forgo the last week's favourite: Roly Poly.
It means that its really important, if you want to encourage participation, to be ready to give them the attention they need when they do participate (sometimes that means noticing, but then looking the other way - tricky, huh?), being ready to congratulate them on their successes and also providing the support they need - physical and/or emotional - as they stumble through their early efforts.
Its really important to pay close attention - because often toddlers are participating before it's very noticeable: their lips move o-so-slightly to the words of songs; their heads sway almost imperceptibly; one toe taps. When you let them know you notice it and you want to play along, they realize that its all natural to them; that they are compelled to move, with others to the music, and they are inspired to share even more.
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